Hello Everyone. Hello. Heh. Welcome to La— Carmine. Carmine Community Radio. [giggly] I am your host. Your /official/ community radio host. Heh. (this is so exciting…). Before I get into the more pressing matters, let me get into what’s really important: myself! My name is January. Van Pelt. Some people call me Jan… Some people. I was born in Summer. I got into Radio at a young age. And I am from ~Lavender Town~ Oh… such a great name. Lavender… Lav-ender. Lay-vendor. Lay-Vender Town. Vender Town. The Vend. Lay-Vendirty. Lay-Vendirty Town. Uh… anyways. Lavender Town. I am a real homeboy! Go Lavender! Uhm. I moved to Toro recently. For… some reason. I’m not sure. I heard it was weird and charming, and I thought I could spread all of my Lavender Weirdness with you all! Yeah. Uhm, I’d say. Toro… is below my expectations. I thought it would be a bit weirder with the stories I’ve heard. Some… region-wide healing of all ailments. And terrorism! I was looking forward to that! But! But… I think Toro might be an acquired taste. Like… Matcha. Or…… Lavender. Lavender… Chewing Gum. Lavender Chewing Gum. Is that a thing? I hope so. It sounds good. Lav-End-Er… Chew-Ing Gum… Lav… Wait! No. I’m not doing this again. Stay on script, January. Do not mess this up January… Right! Well. There are certain astigmatisms about Lavender Town. Astigmatism? No. That’s not what that is. Stigmas! Stigmae… Stigmas. About people from ~Lavender Town~ but those simply aren’t true. There are no ghosts in Lavender To— Well… there are. But, not the kind you’re thinking of. There are /certain ghosts/… but they’re pixelmon. Pests. Not actual ghosts. Real ghosts don’t exist. Maybe. I hope… not. I hope ghosts aren’t realllll… eh. Well. I don’t know. I kind of do. It’d be nice to know what happens after we die. Do we go to some heaven or hell, or, do we roam the earth… malevolently. Or benevolently. Or whatever. Or do we just… die. Does it all end? Is a void of nothingness, incomprehensible to us now. Something we don’t feel. Like sleep, except infinite. *sigh* Well. *gulp* I’m alive now. And breathing! And using however many breaths I have to broadcast to you, the people of Toro. I… am also a people of Toro. I’m here now. I’m present. I am home. This is as much my home as it is yours, radio listener. Because home is where you are. And I’m here. In Toro. For… time.
Okay. Onto news. The Aurelia department is a rolling out a new line of home decorate. I, personally do not know how to decorate. If anyone out there is an Amateur Interior Decorator, hit me up at the station.
And speaking of the Station. There is a new program. This one! So, as always with a new show, we need more people than me. Currently me and my team of pixelmon are the ones writing and taping the shows, and they’re filling in interning positions. And while they’re all very good boys, girls, and agender sentient rock formations, they unfortunately need to supervised. So I need some human help. If you’re interested in being in my crew or interning for me, come to the station in Carmine! It’s noticeable by it’s large statue, of which I don’t necessarily enjoy, but it’s in honor of someone I’ve never heard of, so I can’t be too critical.
Also! Coren Ross is hosting seasonal Classical Concerts at the resort island off the coast of Toro. This flyer says it’s casual, to bring your friends, enjoy the island, and hang out. But the “hang out” is in quotes. Huh!
Now for the weather. In this upcoming season, things are looking to be sunny! Or not. Weather is finicky. What? Were you expecting something else? Well, I’m not a meteorologist! I don’t study meteors. And I don’t know anyone who does.
This episode is supported by Starboks! Come to Starboks and get the drink the drink of the season: A grande vanilla bean frappuccino with heavy cream, half soy, Lactaid Milk, .14 with cream in a venti cup, no ice, no water, natural tropius sweetener, combee honey, Extra Caramel Drizzle, Extra alolan Coconut flakes, Extra Greek Yoghurt, Matcha powder, 34 degree foam, leaving some room, banans, strawberries, 2 scoops of protein powder, additional mocha chips, Raw sugar, no whip, no sweet cream, add agave, cherubi topping, a third with almond milk, and the rest with coconut… And… there’s no coffee in that. Well. You could also get my favorite: A regular iced coffee!
So for now, I’ll leave. Not Toro, the airwaves. My time is up and now for… whatever follows me. Well, I have many things that follows me. Some faster than others. But the next program. I’ll talk with you next time, Carmine. Goodbye… *sigh* Toro…